On June 14th after I wrote my last post we heard from my brother for the 1st time since the day after Mother's Day. He called my house, my cell, and my mother's cell no one answered. He left us both messages stating he was in the hospital and was on the waiting list for the 12 step rehab he was sick of living this life and he missed us and needed to change.
OOOOOOOOHHHHH wait, I know most of you who have been reading our posts are happy to hear this news. I, however, am a little reluctant to be happy. I have heard all of this before. My brother has been in rehab 6 or 7 times each time did great gets discharged and instead of following the program he goes right back to the way he was. My brother also has a court date coming up and he likes to run to rehab to show a judge he is trying to change. So I am not sure how to react to this news. I am so happy he is going he needs too. He needs to find on and actually work it. I hope with all my heart he is going to do it this time. Now I have to figure out a way to be supportive but not give up my recovery from his addiction and let him know I am still holding my ground. Just because you go doesn't mean everything will be OK. My heart is torn right now. Not sure what to do or how to feel.
Lots of love and healing,