Sorry it has been so long since I have written a blog. Life has been crazy busy. Starting in July we begin our daughters sport season it goes until November and then indoor club season begins. AHHHHH I feel like its all I do.
Anyway, things have been a slightly calm around here. We have begun making a new home our house yay its only been over a year since we closed on the house. LOL! We of course spent another Thanksgiving and Christmas without my brother. He is still in his long term rehab however, it is now COURT ORDERED!!! YAY! He is still facing a lengthy jail sentence for other charges. I can't think about it though. He had everything he needed and still decided to use and steal. I read on another blog that addict and criminal eventually become on in the same. SO TRUE.
I have made peace with the fact that the brother I once had is gone, never to come back. My brother now is a recovering crack addict and a felon. I realize that things will never be the same. The questions in my head are ongoing. Will I ever trust him? Can I ever believe a word he says? Can I ever let him in my house without hiding my good silverware? Well I don't really have good silverware but you know what I mean. The same questions you have in your mind about your addict.
So on to the holidays.....
Thanksgiving 2012
Horrible all the way around.... I was the emergency room with Bronchitis that turned into Pneumonia ugh. I was so sick I couldn't even eat :( Our addict was not here. Of course missed.
Christmas 2012....
The hubs had to work so the whole deal was on me Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning. The children woke up at 4AM ahhhhhhhh... Opened presents back to bed. I had asked my mom if my brother was invited because I didn't want to not have a gift for him if he was coming. Now some of you may be thinking a gift pshhhh I wouldn't buy him a gift. Well we have caught onto his game you see, we don't buy anything worth value on the street. I have bought him socks, underwear, toothbrushes, deodorant, things like that. I believe I also will give him books. But nothing he can pawn or sell. But anyway, mom said she invited him and he said no he didn't want to be around us yet. He wasn't ready. I am surprised and happy at this response. Of course I miss him I haven't seen him in months. We do text and of course I we talk a little on the dreaded facebook and if any of you have read my stuff before you know I have no problem deleting him when he is doing bad. So things have calmed down like I said and I am enjoying it. He gets out of rehab in a couple of months we will see what happens then.....
your story mirrors mine, my 2 younger brothers are drug addicts, its a cycle.. drugs - offend to get drugs - jail - get out be sober for a while- drugs - offend to get drugs and it begins again.
ReplyDeleteI have distanced myself from them out of necessity.
My love couldn't heal them so I love them from a distance x for my kids sake
Addiction interventions will be varying depending on the needs of the individual being intervened upon. A significant number of drug rehab centers and organizations have sprung up to support this kind of people today and their households, men and women who are having difficulties to defeat this terrible disease. Florida Intervention Services
ReplyDeleteHi. I stumbled upon your site while I was putting up my own. I know how hard it is to deal with a drug addict. I have two older brothers who were and it was really hard for us to put them into rehab. My parents kept on trying but as soon as they got out, they always returned to their habit. We do not have any idea if they are still under the influence now or not. I have some sort of anger towards them and I really want to let the anger go, that's why I thought of putting up my site, http://mybrothersweredrugaddicts.blogspot.com/. Your blog is an inspiration and I hope the day comes when my brothers get over their addiction just like how yours did.
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to say thank you for writing this blog. I know everything between you both and your brother has been extremely hard and I envy both of your strengths. This blog has helped me feel a lot better about my feelings towards my own brother who is an addict. Thank you so much.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is at least you still have your brother; I'd rather have my brother alive and in prison than six feet under. I vividly recall those very same feelings of frustration, disappointment, and distrust. Little did I know at the time, though, that having him here was a blessing even with all the horrible drama and stress which surrounded us; at least there was always a chance at saving him. Love should be unconditional. I'm not encouraging enabling him, but I am encouraging you to be his rock. His world has crashed, and the addiction makes him go so far as hurting others to feed it; love him anyway. You're right; he's not the boy you grew up with, and he likely never will be the same person. But in reality, are you the same person you were when you were a little girl? We all change over time, for better or worse. He can still get better with the love and support of the only people in the world who are supposed to love him no matter what. Good luck to you, him and your family. I hope he finds peace and light at the end of the tunnel. Much love.
ReplyDeleteI know a friend who is doing rehab for chemical dependency in Seattle WA. She is doing really well. There's always hope.
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ReplyDeletecourses were start before the situation was much batter
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